For Now

Currently, I'm bundled in layers of coats and scarves. I feel like I haven't taken my scarf off in a couple of days. Lol. ^ ^

This week, I've been exceedingly lazy and bummish. :) But I guess it can't be helped, after a quarter of doom, I think this lazing around is necessary for balance. Unfortunately, I'm stuck working on puppets tonight. :P Tomorrow I have to go to Leslie's house and work on our show... ;_;' So, I really ought to get cracking.

I can't believe it's only 6 days till Christmas. :( I don't think that's right at all. I still feel like it should be in a week or two. Either way, I'm screwed for Christmas greetings and presents. :( I really wanted to make Christmas presents for everyone. But I don't think I'll get to it. Hopefully a card or two... 

My plan is... New Year's presents! :D Or Spring presents! Or just a really really belated Christmas present! :D It's never too late to give presents... Even if it's November..? Maybe... Ahaha...

Speaking about Christmas cards and presents, today I got two of them!  I received one in the mail from someone really unexpected! It was one of the photographers I met at a convention. I barely knew him because I thought he was more into the cosplayer I was cosplaying with at the time. In fact, I thought he didn't even recognize me or remember me from the shoot, let alone know my address! Either way, it really made me smile. I was starting to feel like a lot of the cosplayers I knew were apart of a circle that I could never be apart of. But this small gesture, really meant a lot to me. I really want to give him a Christmas card back. 

Also, someone gave me a subscription to ACP. It was another one of my photographer friends that I met around the same time. Now! I can upload more pictures and costumes. *u* (Wow. I sound like a freak T__T;) 

Either way, I was really touched by both small gestures. T___T; It really made me want to keep making costumes. My passion for it has definitely been dwindling because I felt my reasons were wrong. I mean, I do make them for my own fun and leisure, but I mean, I don't really give it enough time and love. So, now I have a better reason. :)

Other then that, the weather is just ridiculous. It got so cold lately!? I just have no idea how that happened. - -; It seriously feels like snow is about to come any second. 

*prays for snow* 

Happy Christmas everyone. :)

My Dear Friend

Hmm, I'm sure these kinds of posts will end soon... *lesigh*

For sure, this is going to be the last time I help anyone out for a project.  And you know!? It isn't because I don't like working for them, it isn't that I don't like to help out others because I really do!! 

I honestly just don't like disappointing people. :( I don't like it when I can't meet deadlines. And I don't like it when they're not happy. Blarrg! I just can't take it! I am seriously itching to get working on my own projects... and I can't even start it until I get through with the one's I've fallen into. 

Again, it really isn't the other party's fault. I really shouldn't have accepted to help them in the first place. But they asked for my help... But...

BUT could they give me some slack? I've basically spent the last several days working on one project after the other... Since Wednesday, I've managed to pull 4 all nighters, and I'm probably going to pull one tonight as well for tomorrow's final. Gahhhh, I hate this complaining I do. 

I don't want to say, "I'm just a student" because that's putting limits... but REALLY, I don't want to go to sleep at 7 am making lists about things I have to do the next day, I want to wake up and and freak out that I'm 30 minutes behind schedule. I want to EAT breakfast and enjoy the dinosaurs in my oatmeal! I want my TEA to actually SEEP! I want to lounge in my pajamas instead of head straight out the door. I want to take cat naps that don't replace my night sleep. I want to MAKE puppets for FUN and not feel horrible while doing it. I want to see my friends. I want to have fun. :(

I'm sorry if my priorities were jumbled by the thoughts of this quarter ending. I just can't wait to get out of here. Yesterday night, was horrible. :( I don't think I've ever pulled such a painful all nighter. T__T; Besides being so behind in making the porfolio, because it was large I had to work on the floor... BAH! I was basically on my knees for 24 hours. I seriously stood up... and fell over because my legs were so numb. Definitely, my brain cells are NOT regenerating...

Huuu... I want Christmas break to be fun and not consumed by this upcoming project that I just got lectured about... :( Huuuu.... I want to make Christmas presents. T___T;

OK. I better get crackin' on my final for tomorrow... :)

Good luck everyone! :3

Holy Wow.

My brain was just launched into space. *Twitch* I just found the ultimate cutting ninja. She's the super magic queen of cuts. *dies* Seriously, I can't believe someone exists that's so OCD it's scary. I'm scared. She cuts these layers of paper, one after the other, in the most robotic fashion... and creates these magical papers. HOLY WOW. It made me want to drop my cuttings... *sob*

Check her out at www.jenstark.com 

Trust me, her drawings, sculptures, and animations are all worth it. 

And it's all hand cut. *_____* 

I'm not worthy of the exact-o.

Other then that... *stares behind her* I'm stuck here in lalaland... Unable to find the motivation to do anything. T___T; I've had this project since last week and I've been unable to push myself to work on it. Darn you energy sucking puppets. :( I just realized how much I hate painting.... ._.;

I REALLY have to get a move on my finals though... :{ I think it's going to be really hard for me if I don't get a lot done tomorrow. Bah. I just can't wait for this week to be over. 

Come On, World

Tch. Mankind... you're cutting it close. Losing hope in your abilities, I am.  

Today, I read an article that I found on my friend's facebook regarding her friend who was murdered. :( It was really sad. She was stalked by some creeper and followed to her house where later he shut off the power to while her husband was at work, entered it, and attempted to handcuff her... She was able to barricade herself in a room with her one year old and 3 year old, called her husband, opened the window where the police were, dropped her children to them before he came in, completely handcuffed her and killed her. Wow. Depressing. Really people, what drives you to do such things... It makes me sad. It also makes me want to become a hermit.  

Yesterday was Pau Hana, my final for Tap Class. :) I was surprised by Yanna who gave me this ridiculously large and purple poster. Hu hu hu, I glad you could make it Yanna. *u* I hope it wasn't boring or anything. :)

Court, Jimmy, and co. couldn't make it... Sheesheek. *Karate CHOP* It's bah to listen to stories of the same excuse. Not that it really matters whether they came or not, but it irks me when the stories are different. Ahahaha.. - -;; My parent's took Vivian and I to Sushi Mura. *___* So great. I wanna go now. I'm so hungry. T__T; 

Other then that... Today I worked on my doom of a project for Miss Irons. :(

This is how it goes through the projector...

I'll post more pictures later... I'm sleep. T___T; Darn you homework that isn't for school. I still need to get cracking on my finals. :T Huuu... ;3

Arise from your Sleeeeep

So basically this week, I've been cramming all nighters. And it's not the all nighter where you go to sleep at 4 and wake up at 6, which is what I've been doing the whole quarter... BUT those ones where you don't sleep at all and just work till 7 and then get up and go to class. *____* It's been hell. 

Thursday was the worst. I actually lost my hands in Ceramics class! They felt like jelly. Lol. We were supposed to present out ceramics final project.... and trust me. I did not do as well as I hoped. I was able to sway the teacher with some stencils... But I was only able to string, bead, and hang seven bells. :( 

After class, I ran to my favorite sushi restaurant. They're closing today. :( So yesterday, I went with the original gang to celebrate their generosity that they've given us these past 3 years. Since I moved out with my old roommates, I haven't really seen them this whole quarter. So getting back together with them was kind of nice. It was a little awkward because they had been hanging out as a group, but I wasn't really apart anymore. :( It makes me kind of sad. 

Then I ran back to the apartment to meet with Leslie to pick up the projectors for Sunday. I got back... at around 8, loitered on the computer till 9 and fell into a coma before I could savor watching the Office. I kinda fell in and out of sleep on the couch enough to know that my roommates went to study at Boba Loca and get Taco Bell. But they had returned already when I woke up at 3 and that's when I moved to my room for the first time this week and slept til 12. HORRAY! Epic story of cell regeneration! :D

Today is Pau Hana! Its the final performance for all the dance classes in the WAC department. :) I'm going to be in two tap dances. ^ ^ Hu hu, I'm really excited. I'm going to make a bow tie for myself. XD

I really REALLY need to take this precious time to work on homework.

Good luck on finals and such. :3

You Can't Trace Me

Today was nice. :) Last night was not nice. It wasn't that I worked much... it was that I didn't work at all! And all I did was loiter online doing absolutely nothing till 4! - -; I really am just asking for it, because here I am, doing the same thing... I'm just looking for trouble. :( Internet be my friend!

But today was nice. :)

My sister drove all the way to UCLA for me from Riverside just so we could surprise my mom for her birthday. :3 My mom always claims to have horrible birthdays, so we always try to make it extra special each year. :) This time we got her a bunch of things that remind us of her, like red nail polish, ferero rocher, winterfresh gum, and sanrio notebooks. Lol. Each has a sort of story to it. :)

I only stayed home for 2 hours before my dad drove me back home. :) I really miss home. It was great even for the short time. Huu.. I just want this quarter to end already. I just want to stop working on things and just go to sleep on time for once. :( Jeez.

On other things, I have a new sushi buddy. :) I ate sushi with my friend, Minh today. I feel good. This is basically the first time I've gone out to eat with someone other than my roommate. I really need to get out more... My hermit ways are seriously eating away at my brain. 

Besides that, I've been troubled lately. :T Its the same story over and over... that's been going on for the past two years. Ugh. I just want it to end already!! Basically, this girl has polluted my thoughts and actions towards costume making. Its just not fair... I won't go into details because whenever I tell anyone these things, I feel like I'm seeking pity. But I realized recently that the way I look at many things now is so distorted. But everyone revolving in that world thinks she's the sweetest thing... I just don't understand. I really don't. Everything about her is a lie... she twists stories and somehow I always come out as the bad person. :T

Ugh. Ok. I'll stop. One day, I'll go into it... maybe, when I can't take it anymore.

BLARGH! Other then that! Final week of school school is about!! I'm going to attempt working on everything on Saturday (*dies*) Seriously though, the internet has to be shut down from here. :3

From the Depths of my Pockets

Guh. Here I am... procrastinating as usual. Huu... Well, I figured since I have a stomach ache... I'll take a break and write about what's going on. :)

So tomorrow is the FAST application deadline. It's basically UCLA's annual fashion show in the spring. And though I know, I've never really dealt with 'fashion' and more costume,  I decided to give it a try anyway... I mean, its nice to know all fields of the this work.

My line is cheesily named "From within my Pockets". Its basically items, places, or environments around me that I've brought to life. Cheese-tastic, I know, spare me. .__.;

But here are the sketches I've decided to turn in. All together there are 6, but I'll show you 4. The other two aren't really my favorites, at least drawn...

If my dining room came alive... 

{I don't understand why everythings underlined.}

An old photograph...

Ok, for this one I was inspired by the fact that my pockets are filled with sugar packets that I intend to refill my sugar jar with... but I don't. So whenever I wear a jacket... the pockets are normally always filled with sugar... 

So, if she came alive...

If my computer turned inside out and walked about...

Basically that's it. :)

I actually am really screwed. Tomorrow I have an appointment with my costume teacher to turn in half of my portfolio... however I have none of it done. Instead I am loitering around and am absolutely sleepy. 

I also have to paint some puppets, bah. And... finish the other half of the cut out... T___T; BUT! Luckily I got to spare myself some time!! ;3 It's not due tomorrow... it's due Sunday. *u*

Anyway... procrastination time must end. Wish me luck!

Hope everyone's having a great almost end of the quarter. :3

Sundays are Poisoned

A wave of crap that needs to be done tonight just hit me smack in the face. What have I been doing this whole time? Where did the time go?! :(

I WANT TO GO HOME. 

I don't like school anymore. 

I Want to Stay Home

My laziness has seriously reached an all time high. I don't even want to upload pictures because I'm so lazy. GUH. Home makes me lazy. But I'd rather be here than in my for-some-reason-cold apartment. :( I just want worries to be over with. I just want to eat food and be fat and happy. I just want time to be my friend. Can't we just be friends already! 

Jeez. I'm going crazy. Yesterday, I went clubbing. I actually don't normally go, but either way it was a great adventure again almost involving police and having my checking card swallowed by the atm machine.  Bah... It was still fun though. :)

Today, in celebration for my mom's birthday, we all went to a cheap massage place in San Gabriel. Lol. OMG... the guy who massaged me really had no mercy. I think my back is broken. My rock of a back has been broken in. He had a kick out of my pants. My pants are the kinds that can zip off in two places so it can be long shorts or shorter than long shorts. So when I started unzipping the first level, my massager was amused. I think my sister's massager was too. 

We decorated the Christmas tree today. :) I know its basically the same fake Christmas tree, with the same decorations...

But I absolutely love it. I love how epic it always looks and how Christmassy I feel after putting it up. I love that I can see it through the window when we pull into the drive way and how its always on. Bah, it's my favorite.

We also took our annual Christmas photo for the Costco Christmas Card that we send to families and what not. It's so funny. I feel like its a contest between all our relatives. We all send out family christmas cards to each other with (for some reason) just the kids on it. For some reason, our Christmas card always makes Yanna (my sister) and me look like a couple with our son... T___T; Whatever. We still have better photos. Ahaha.

I watched part of the movie 'Keeping the Faith' with Ben Stiller and Edward Norton. Guh. I loved the line Brian says to Anna

 in the confessional... "I'm the best version of myself when I'm with you." *dies* God, romantic comedies are just so darn great. 

Anyway... I've been procrastinating since Wednesday. :( I really need to get a move on my work... or I'll be in deep trouble. *Shudder* I can just feel it coming, the wave of horrible piles of stinky work. Huuu...

Hope all of your Thanksgivings were great. :)

My Thanksgiving basically was composed of this. A candy apple making session at a sleepover at my grandma's house. 

Why, yes! Hello there, I am Rosie the Riveter!

And this is what our Christmas card is going to look like.... kinda. 

I wonder if you noticed. Christian's face was so wacky in the actual photo... so i cut out a face from another photo and placed it on top. o_o;

Hu hu hu, Christmas is here. *u*

My dad and Christian helped put up decorations. :3 

Rocket Pubes

I'm done! And... I really REALLY probably shouldn't be taking the time to post right now... because I've basically decided to make my ceramics project... christmas presents... and I want to give many people christmas presents. SO! I better get started. Lol. I fail.

But... here's the progress!

Here's Mr. Projector. :) He's sweet. But with my luck, during the performance rehearsal his bulb went out. Horray me! At least it wasn't at the actual one. :)

Yup. 

That's a good 16 ft for you. Guh. a 16 ft x 10 in stencil... 

I never thought I'd make one of those. Lol.

Basically... I sketched out the whole thing before I started cutting. It helps me know where I am... and what my goal is...

This particular stencil involves dolls and birdcages and creepy things...  o_o;

Then you just robotically cut throughout the night, till your eyes start flashing and your brain melts. T__T; I want Turkey. I want home.

I actually don't know what I'm cutting... But I just keep goin.

Around this point, I think I started getting carpal tunnel. (sp?) My blunt blade was not being my friend. And the small table was my enemy.

On a happy note! We got this ghetto christmas tree! Its sooo darn sparkly. Man. It looks nothing like the picture.. The green leaves are soooo obviously fake. But how can you not love it. It's just calling for your love. 

I went to the fashion district today. :) And these are the goodies I bought, which I should be assembling and organizing for tomorrow's class that I soooo definitely want to ditch. Ugh. But I won't because I don't like the class very much.

Here's the end of it... for now. I just ended it here because at 5 in the morning your brain really does stop working... and so do your hands.

I really liked how the birdcage came out. :3

Here's the beginning as a shadow ^ ^

Here's my buddy. 

She folds up pretty well... 

Hope I can convince the teacher... 

Other then that, today was very fun. I have proved to myself that I am the ultimate creeper! I not only single-handedly solved the mystery of a creeper trying to be mysterious on my Deviantart account, I figured out that I actually have met him in real life before.  {Lol. Real life.. hu hu hu}

Someone on DA was trying to play mysterious games with me by hiding his identity and image and saying that he sees me on campus {which just irked me... I mean, doesn't it scare you knowing that someone is watching you... but you don't know who?}. So through my ultimate creeper skills! By using only his obsessive love for jeans, his screenname, and his initials... I was able to find his photobucket which revealed his face, and pin him to a faceless image on facebook. Man... I'm a creeper. 

Either way... serves them right to try and sneak about me. 

Other then that, I am soooo screwed. As usual. Time to crank out those ceramics! My brain is already mushy. Huuu... I hunger. 

} Title comes from: passiveaggressivenotes.com (top10) {

Snip snip snip

Aaaahh... The cutting begins. *dies*

Magic Lanterns and Golden Sarees

Through complete coincidence, I met a professor that took me to his office...
And in his office was an array of magical lanterns!



No joke! That's what it's called! They covered his room, filled shelves, and tables, in all different sizes. The other wall was just completely covered with books of all sorts. I spotted a tamagochi and a couple japanese toys amidst the display of treasures... and somewhere in the middle was his desk and computer, pilled with papers and completely enveloped with post-it notes that stuck to almost every part of this desk.



Ahhh! I'm in so much awe! He was such an amazingly cool teacher! How could I have not known?! It just astounds me how there exist magic rooms in these bleak buildings!

I'm kinda a little down in the dumps though... :T

So, yesterday, I headed off to the debut performance I costume designed for. She asked me to fix some minor details on her accessories and help her with her costumes and so I did. I had come with another teacher, so we picked up our tickets and sat down in the audience.

My teacher says to me: "You don't have a bio, like last performance..."

I had noticed that... and usually I get at least a sentence, but really the only thing running in my mind was, "How come she didn't thank me in her statement?" I could see our friend the music designer and other collaborators... but I was a little sad that she didn't mention me.

And I know. GOD, I know! That I should be happy enough with just my name in there, but I really did put a lot of effort and work into her performance. :( Its already one thing that I'm not getting paid, but its really the fact that this isn't a job! It isn't a profession... it's my time and I'm doing it because I'm her friend, because I want to help her.

Sometimes I think... is it really worth it to be working on these things? She told me that its real experience as a costume designer... but really, am I getting any experience out of it that I wouldn't be getting if I decided to use that time to work on my own show and make a name for myself? I really don't know. Gah. I don't want to sound so stubborn and naive. But I guess, all I wanted was that thank you.

Either way... you just have to keep going huh? :) I just can't wait for this quarter to end. I just want Christmas time to come already... Lol. I want apple cider. I want to play. :3

Longer than my Eyelashes

Today, I got to catch up on a lot of going abouts with a friend that I used to hang out with often. I think its really weird how people move in and out of circles they're apart of. I've definitely become a hermit this quarter...

But enough of that, this morning I found myself hiding behind the wall infront of the shuttle stop. Some grad student that had the same morning bus schedule as me, whom I had the misfortune of giving my email to, was standing there and I was in no mood to play witty games. You see, we had a rally of emails... But he really had some nerve to say some things that he said! Ugh, sometimes I am surprised at how brave some people can be. After telling me I was a flake because it came with being an art major, precociously telling my how to reply to an email by pressing the reply button, and telling me that some of my hobbies don't attract real friends I wasn't feeling too cool with him. And I suppose after a sort of sassy email back about how actually, its not flakey to be so busy doing more important things that hanging out with you... I think he sort of got a little scared, for our short rally ended quickly and so did our coincidental bus meetings.

And though in my mind... I pictured myself, the next time I saw him, to be strong willed and as unafraid as my last email seemed, I found myself gingerly holding the edge of the wall which hid me in hopes for that bus to leave and a second bus to pick me up. *lesigh* Boys are scary sometimes.

Other then that, my hands seem to be aging faster than the rest of me. :) Because our Ceramics teacher wasn't in today... I snuck to the wheels and tried my luck at throwing. Hahaha, it IS definitely harder than it looks. Just getting the clay to center and trying to stop the wheel from turning with my heels was a ridiculous feat. After a good two hours, I succeeded in making two soy sauce containers... that are slightly tilted. I must admit though, it was a lot of fun. :) I wish I could be in the studio more often.

A good number of projects that are due are sneaking up on me... And as usual, it hasn't occurred to me at all, that maybe I should start on them... Hmmm...

Tomorrow is the debut of Sheetal's performance that I costume designed. :) On Saturday... though I probably should be doing my homework... I'm going to be making a costume for an online contest. *fail* On Sunday, I'm going to go fabric shopping with Anela and co. and hopefully Vivian will help me photograph my costume. :3

On a sad note... ants have officially raided our apartment. I pray their scouring searches lead them not to basically my-only-source-of-food-stash of cookies. :)

Root Beer Popsicles

I guess I just want to elaborate a little. :) There are all together 31 bells. They are made of Kai Porcelain and are strung with ribbon. I used a good number of my glass beads for the ringer and the wind catchers are photos from the summer. :3

Actually, I think I'm going to take them down tomorrow. >_<>

I strung them to the ceiling... with nylon thread, which mind you, is actually really thin. (maybe that's why a number of them dropped. :T)

Those are actually digital images... printed from Shutterfly. :)

Stay put you silly picture! Stop moving so much!

It was really fun, overall. I am given the next step, which is to basically expand the project... so I think I'll be making a bunch more... probably bigger too. :)

Other then that, I've completely wasted my day by loitering online. Haha... I didn't do an ounce of homework! Though, I did meet up with an elementary friend of mine. And that was nice. I treated myself to boba with Vivian... which didn't make my now-empty-pockets too happy. But it was really head-ache-relieving, so I guess it was worth its 2.95. Other then that, I found myself trying to remove this black gunk off of the bench next to my desk. And somehow in the process... All the black gunk ended up on my hands. 

I'm going to have to make a pair of shorts tomorrow. :T I'm not too confident in my lack of pattern making skills... but I'll just try. 

What else... I went grocery shopping today! It was really hard not to be tempted by the cookie dough ice cream and all the juices. *Swoon* Again... the same story with the empty pockets. I did manage to scramble change for rootbeer float popsicles though. :) And eggs. Which is basically what my diet is. Huuu...

 

Procrastination is the Key

I really ought to be doing something more important right now... like I don't know, MY RESEARCH PAPER. *dies* I really have no sense of crisis. Its almost five and I just started. :( What a pain, I am. 

Other then that, today was no good for Costume Design class. I sort of am so shy about presenting my work that I just don't... and I think I'm secretly getting docked off for that. Ugh... I want to hide sometimes. 

This week is going to be pretty hectic. Besides the research paper due tomorrow, I also have a ceramics project due, and an artist research in class presentation due tomorrow too. On Wednesday I have to come up with a stencil cut out that is equivalent to 3 minutes of a show... If it were 8 ft tall... it would have to be 20 ft wide. :( But! The scale is going to be a lot smaller and projected..  Either way, I haven't started and I'm basically screwed. 

Sheetal's performance is this Friday.

On Wednesday I'm also going to be putting up posters and flyers for the upcoming puppet show thats going to be shown in Little Tokyo, called Pink Dress. :D It'll be on December 6th and 7th. :)

Guh, my gosh, I really need to get working. Why, brain? Must you fall sleepy when it comes to school work?

Pull Through!

It has occurred to me that I now uncomfortable writing in my other blogs. Livejournal has made me accutely sensitive to one particular viewer. Thus, my blogging has been hindered and not as detailed as they usually are. I suppose I should be on a search for a new blog location for now. 

I've made a tumblr account and have been trying to get used to that one... however because it doesn't really allow comments from other viewers I sort am not so interested. 

Of all the blogs I have, I think I am going to try and settle here. At least for now... Though as to why I am up at this ungodly hour is something even I'd like to know. I really should have been more keen on doing my homework before 1 am. Oh well. 

Other then that... I suppose I can gladly admit that this week I have proved to be the most lazy fart. Compared to other days, I at least know when I should feel a crisis of work load... yet I haven't and I've been paying for it dearly. :T

In the end, I know I'll pull through, even if it means sleeping with my eyes open tomorrow. 

Paris Je t'aime

Man. I really need to pass some gas... 

And exercise. :O

 

Snip, Snip, Snip

It seems I can cut hair... somewhat. Very poorly though, however. Can I cut yours? :)